When I found out last year that Alton would be doing a book signing of the upcoming Feasting on Asphalt: The River Run, I was on the look out for the closest town to me. I knew, from his previous book tours, the likelihood of Alton Brown showing up anywhere near my pathetic part of the world was slim to none... and slim just left town. So I eyed the "Where's AB" page on altonbrown.com with the hopes that Alton would be somewhere close enough to visit.Then in January it appeared. On Alton's website it listed a fundraiser for the Cobb County Public Library. There was to be a book signing and a lecture. And the thing was going to be held Alton's own hometown. I pondered that for about a nanosecond, then knew I had to go. Well, Marietta, Ga is over 500 miles from where I live but the rest of the book tour was going to be out in the Midwest. So, this was going to be my only opportunity to be apart of the Feasting on Asphalt book signing. Which, of course, being the humongous dorkweed of a fan that I am, it was a must I attend at least one of his book signings.
As the days drew near, I became excited and anxious. I met Alton back in August 2007. He was very nice and charming. I hoped that he was still the same fun guy from Nashville.
The day of the event, I started the morning nervous, sweaty palms and everything. The pre-event reception began at 11:30 am and we got to the school early. My mom spotted some tables near the front, by the podium, and thought it would be a good place to sit. I agreed. The thought of being within feet of Alton made my hands sweat even more. I quietly sat at the table and waited. We conversed with too very nice women from Georgia--a few towns over from Marietta, I think they were a bit shocked we drove all this way to see Alton.
Finally, mom spied Alton coming. I looked out of the wall of windows and saw him coming into the room from outside. He made his way along the back of the room. Working the crowd. I have no idea how many people were there, but I just wanted him to get closer! He worked the room and finally got to our table. He greeted the two women we had been talking with, then another pair of gals to my left. Then there he was--right in front of me.
He gave me a greeting. I think I shook his hand. Its a blur. I remember telling him that I wouldn't forget my name this time. I told him the last time I met him he made me forget my name. Alton replied, "I'm sorry." I probably gave him the world's dopiest grin. Then Alton asked, "So, we've meet before?" I responded, "In Nashville, last summer." Then he said, "I'm sorry." I remember responding something like no, that's okay or some such dumb thing and smile at him. I managed to say some other things to him before he moved over to talk with my mom. Then he was off to other table. My brain turned to mush, again, in his presence--I totally forgot to snap my picture with him.
The woman with him, from the event, was herding him around to the tables trying to get him to greet everyone. She was telling people no posed pictures. At one table Alton said something like, I'm not posing. He has such great sarcasm. When Alton made completely around the room, the woman was leading him back up front. He came back over to my table and said, "Hi, I'm Alton," to me again. I know I grinned that dorky smile. Then he said, "I've already met you." I fired back, "I'll greet you again." I don't remember what happened after that. I know he walked back behind me and waited to be introduced.
Alton then moved to the podium. There he was feet from me. He talked and I snapped pictures. I so hope it didn't bother him too much but I couldn't help it and I got some very nice pictures. He took questions from the audience. He talked about the next Feasting on Asphalt, which is changing to Feasting on Waves. Alton was heading out to film it the very next day. Finally, near the end I managed to ask him a question about what he used to film Feasting on Asphalt. He told me (and everyone) some of the technical stuff but its all went out of my head. I'm quite embarrassed by that because I so interested in film and television production, my undergraduate degree is even in mass communications... but remember, my brain is mush by now. There were a few closing remarks then Alton went to get ready for the lecture.
Because I bought tickets to the pre-event, we had very good seats for the lecture. I was in the third row almost dead-center. As Alton talked and walked around the "stage" area, I managed to snap even more pictures. Again, I hope I didn't bother him too much. I felt like a paparazzi with the shutter clicking away and flash popping with every other word.
Alton's lecture was extremely interesting. He didn't talk about cooking, he didn't do a demo of cooking. But he did talk about his philosophy on food and eating. The lecture, entitled: "AB's Practical Guide to Eating Planet Earth," really elevated him from being this cook on TV to a real thinker.
Besides making you think, Alton conducted the lecture in is typical humor. I was laughing so hard at times. Alton definitely be a stand-up comedian if this TV cook thing doesn't pan out. There were a few moments that where just so RTFLMAO I couldn't begin to retell them in a just manner. Thought one moment near the beginning of the lecture, someone's cell phone rang and Alton in his dry, sarcastic way, had fun with the interruption.
After this enlighten and hysterical lecture, we got in line for the book signing. I had my Feasting on Asphalt: The River Run book with me having only procured it the week before from Amazon.com. Yes, it was preordered the day I first could back in October. Dork, remember.
The line wasn't too bad. It didn't seem very long until I could hear Alton talking with people. Then I could see the table wasn't to far from me. My hands got sweaty again. I anxiously watched as the couple in front of me got there book signed, then it was my turn. I was face-to-face with Alton again. I started by asking him if he would sign a copy of the Feasting book for my friend. I told him the sad story about wanting to come, but that her grandmother passed way earlier in the week. Alton said something, I didn't catch it then something like "sure." He signed the book. The I want on to ask for mine to be signed. He joked that I needed to hurry up.
I pulled out an unusual piece for him to sign next, a small canister for Kodak 35mm movie film. Alton took it and said the specs on the film, then opened the lid and sniffed inside. I asked him if he could tell the vintage from sniffing it. He smiled at me and as I continued to talk, he reached into my bag and pulled out the copy of the Kitchen User's Manual we had been given earlier that morning in the pre-event thing. He ended up signing that twice!The last thing I had was for Alton himself. I told him that I had come a long way to see him and wanted to give him something. At that point, Alton backed away from me and told the guy next him helping with the books to back up too. Alton made some funny comment about me having my guns and ammo with me. I laughed and shook my head. Then I told him I noticed in the early episodes he had Fiestaware around the kitchen. He said yes and that he loves Fiestaware. Then he said, "but it's poison." I knew he was just trying to get me, I brushed it off and said I like it too. Then I unwrapped the trivet I brought for him and handed it too him. Alton took it and looked at it. He asked, "This is for me?" I told him yes.
For a moment, I think it caught him by surprise. He continued to look at it and looked as if he was going to sign it, then repeated, "This is for me?" I said yes. Then he thanked me and smiled.
It was mom's turn. She brought a spring-type kitchen scale for him to sign. I had joked with her that Alton wouldn't like it because its not digital. She told him she knew it wasn't the type of scale he used but would he sign it. He took the scale and played with it a bit by bouncing the top up and down. Then he signed it. To top it all off, he made the little AB caricature on it! What? Here I am huge, dorky fan and my mom, who only watches any of Alton's shows when I force her to, gets the AB caricature! Life sucks!
After Alton signed her scale, a woman from the event ushered us to leave. Of course, I wanted to stay. Maybe say one more thing to Alton. But, I had to leave. As we were leaving, I said something to him. And my mush brain has no idea what that was. But it was something that made Alton reply to me. He thanked me for the Fiestaware gift again and I walked away.
Just like that it was over. Weeks, no months, of anticipation all gone in a matter of moments. Meeting Alton for the second time was as great as the first time. He is so nice, witty and charming. The few short minutes you spend with him are wonderful. He seems to genuinely care that you have come out to see him. It's wonderful that he takes the time to greet you individually and talk with you. I have attend autograph sessions before (mainly sports figures but no one really, really big... well I did attend one with William Shatner) and all of them were pretty much the same, hand the person something to sign move on. Nothing to write home about for certain.
But meeting Alton was different. Both times. I thoroughly enjoyed meeting him and talking to him. It may sound silly, even stupid, but meeting Alton and getting to talk with him ranks highly in the events of my life.
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